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The Teeny Tiny Times | weather |
| July 21, 2004 |
Penguins Earn Reputation as Noble Bird "Flightless, Schmightless" Says Spokesbird DUMONT D'URVILLE, ANTARCTICA --- A spokesbird for the entire world-wide Assembly of Penguins today proclaimed for the 1,250th time that penguins are noble animals, worthy of trust and praise by primates of all stripes. "The fact that we cannot fly is constantly overrated and overvalued by our detractors," stated the handsome spokesbird. Flight itself is overrated." |
N. Hemishpere Blogger Wittig Unfair to Penguins Slights and Insults Fill Ridiculous robwit.net MAWSON STATION, ANTARCTICA --- Three especially good-looking penguins announced today that they are officially protesting the number and nature of "penguin gags" on the web log ("blog") or one Rob Wittig of the Northern Hemisphere |
"Had Wittig a shred of sense in that giant simian head of his, he would realise that he should not only leave penguins out of his blog, but he should be sending large barrels of fish this way. We are hungry," said the middle penguin, who is extraordinarily beautiful. Poll: Penguins Dislike Blogs 73% of the Elegant Birds Interviewed Couldn't Care Less ACADEMICIAN VERNATSKIY STATION, ANTARCTICA --- A poll released today by the APWCCLAI , The Association of Pentuins Who Couldn't Care Less About the Internet, contained a scathing condemnation of blogs, bloggers, and the entire practice of blogging. In short: "Primates: give up" i |
Penguins Especially Pretty in Dim Light Lengthy Antarctic Twilight "Built to Make Penguins Look Appealing," Expert Avers NOVALAZAROVSKAYA STATION, ANTARCTICA --- No floodlight? No problem. Photographers will be pleased to learn that penguins are particularly photogenic when the sun is low upon the horizon. ![]() |